Whilst investigating everything weddings on internet I came across an article written by an English journalist who attended a
Spanish wedding. Their account of how they perceived the customs and habits of the hosts amused me and made me realize that seen from the outside some of it can seem “different”. Lots of articles cover destination
weddings in Spain and all the benefits of choosing this sunny country, yet hardly any talk about its own traditions. I thought it would be interesting to talk about the typical Spanish weddings of old,
Granada style. Some of the customs still hold true today, some don´t and they all vary from town to town. So let´s start at the very beginning, well nearly…
Traditionally couples would be engaged for many years whilst they saved up for a home of their own. This was done so that after the wedding they had everything they needed to start their life together. It is not uncommon for offspring to live with their parents well into adult life and by that I mean late 30´s and on! Maybe this is because the family unit is very important in Spain, maybe because it is the easiest option but in some smaller villages the only way out of the family home was by marriage (it wasn´t unusual for the girl to become pregnant resulting in a “shotgun wedding” and stern catholic upbringing meant that divorce was out of the question). Once they had everything they needed to start a family of their own they would set the date and the families of the bride and groom would put together the guest list.
When the big day arrived, all of the guests would get seriously dressed up regardless of the time of day, it was an opportunity to show off all their finery. They would either go to the church to wait for the bride and groom or they would go to the house of the family who had invited them and accompany them to the church. In Spain they do not have the custom of a best man and the groom enters the church with his mother followed by guests. Traditionally the groom’s guests sit behind him to the right of the church and the bride's guests are seated on the left. The bride leaves her house on her father´s arm followed by her guests and they walk to the church in a procession, the guests enter first and are seated then the bride makes her entrance. It is not uncommon for guests to remain outside the church during the ceremony and once it is over they are joined by everybody else, ready to throw copious amounts of rice “missile style” at the couple! Lots of kissing goes on as each guest wishes the couple all the best for their future as they battle through the crowd to the rice free safety of their car.
Traditionally
the banquet was set for a later hour giving guests time to drive around in a procession loudly sounding out their horns and waving at all and sundry letting everyone know that there had been a wedding and keeping them occupied. In the meantime the couple would be having their wedding photos taken and not a drink would be served until they arrived at the banquet, at which point everyone would raise a glass to toast their future happiness and health. Nowadays most couples have made provisions for their guests and they can relax in the surroundings of
the venue whilst enjoying drinks and canapés until the celebrations start.
A traditional Spanish banquet will begin with cold cuts and snacks whilst everyone gets settled. The meal itself consists of a starter, a fish dish, a refreshing champagne sorbet, a meat dish and a dessert. The cake would be cut a little later and the bride and groom would take this time to go around the tables and chat with each of their guests.
It is tradition to give an envelope with money to the bride and groom unless they have specifically stated otherwise. The amount should never be less than the price of a cover and although it is not unheard of for an empty envelope to appear, it is extremely bad practice and very rude.
After the cake the bride and her bridesmaids hand out a little gift to the ladies, usually a delicate pin with an ornate material flower which by custom is to be worn upside down if you are single (if the pin gets lost it means that you will be married soon). The groom usually hands out cigars to the male guests with the date of their wedding on the label.
Then comes the music. They do not have the custom of a disco playing all their favourite tracks, instead it is usually a live band and once father and daughter have taken to the dance floor and enjoyed their first dance it is time for everyone to join in the dancing, make their way to the free bar or make their way home.
Another method of getting more money which I have only ever seen in the small rural villages, would involve the groom taking a pair of scissors to his tie and auctioning off the pieces which would be placed on a tray and shown to all the guests as they haggled, the Bride would also auction her garter and the money would go towards their honeymoon and the expenses of the wedding.
But the couple´s long day’s not over yet, oh no! Tradition dictates that close friends of the newlyweds enter the future home without their knowledge and prepare practical jokes such as hiding things in the bed sheets, filling it with balloons, hanging banners announcing the marriage off the balcony and lots more. It is with great apprehension that they go home on their first night as husband and wife!
Customarily the Honeymoon didn´t start straight away, but in the following week or so, giving them time to settle into their new home.
And that is more or less a traditional
Spanish wedding. As I began writing I realized that there were so many details I could explain to help people understand this beautiful culture better but some things are just best left for you to discover on your own, otherwise where would the magic be?
